Everyone experiences pain, everyone has been through difficult things in their lives. We often keep those experiences hidden because they are too traumatic, and people have a hard time confronting the negative. That’s how you end up in a society where the abuse of power is so prevalent. I was in a very long abusive relationship. I have experienced every form of abuse from a person who had claimed to love me. That was not love. Most people can’t handle hearing what I have been through; those who I trust know more. In general, it is too much for people, or it hits too close to home. I didn’t smile or really laugh for years. I cried every day for hours on end. I stopped wearing lipstick because he didn’t like it and would refuse to kiss me. Then, at some point I realized I didn’t want him to kiss me anyway. I began wearing it all the time and documenting it. Art was my escape, the only thing he could not take away from me. And eventually after many terrible things happened I made him leave. But the emotional pain and damage holds on long after it’s over. And it’s not until another unspeakable trauma happened that I could get to the point that I needed to speak out.
‘Like a Kiss’ is an expression of those feelings, those dark places, and the pain. Yet you can still find beauty in the ugliest of places. Be warned the content of this art can be triggering for people who have survived domestic violence, emotional abuse and sexual assault. But if I can make this after living through it and one person sees the work and it helps them, then I’m happy with that.
Tina Starr
